What A Frustrating Week. Lets Order Something!!

Hi Steemians,

This is the 3rd out of 7th days for mind torturing, medical school exams, basically a week full of stress eating, insomnia, nausea (sometimes vomiting) and mood swing. Yesterday, I've been having a tough time trying to move on from the mistakes I made in Pediatric exam. Well, I didn't cry or anything, it just like, the world started to look depressed, I've became demotivated and disinterested in doing whatever I enjoyed doing in the past(anhedonia). This is a classic presentation of Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) and if I don't something, I might hate what comes next. Even though all of the symptoms I have pointing out to the same diagnosis, I'm still in denial. Well, whatever, lets adopt the stress eating disorder and order something. It's been awhile since the last time I ate pizza and among all of the pizza franchise in Malaysia, I love Domino the most.

The image was taken from https://www.dominos.com.my

Regret. That's the fuel of my current misery. Usually, we're been given 1 week for study period before the exams week but due to some errors made by the university administrator in arranging our academic schedule, we got 2 weeks of uninterrupted study period. 2 whole weeks and I can't even do well in my exam yesterday. Maybe I didn't put enough effort into studying during those 2 weeks. I've been raking my brain to what I perceived as my optimal level for studying and yet I think I would fail, indefinitely. My mind stopped being positive yesterday, and today, it's not much different. I'm always hoping, whenever I went to sleep and woke up tomorrow, I'll be seeing whatever problems I'm facing with a new outlook and enthusiasm but not today. The world started to look black and white. Everything I ate seems tasteless and whatever I do felt wrong. I hate this feeling.

On the happier note, the pizza is here!!

Two wholes pizza for me. Let's forget about healthy eating for a moment and explore my own sorrow.

Well, it started to feel good again. I pray tomorrow will be better than today, and if it's not, let's hope I'll learned something from this valuable experience. I'm always thought myself to be strong emotionally, but 7 years of failure without much success in doing anything have started to wear me down. That's human nature I guess and I think I'm going to take a break from everything (except for Steemit of course). It's time for me to rest and after much grieving, I'll be strong once again. Currently my life is a mess, but I'll sort it out one by one. It's a marathon not a sprint.