"You're not different, you just don't want to join."

Are you one of those people who have a shy attitude? Wanted to join the group but you thought that it feel's awkward to be with them? Not awkward maybe but you thought it's not good idea to join them. You wanted to have some space because you're afraid what people might think that you became part of them.

There are people who have attitude like that, including me. I don't know if this is not a good attitude because it limits me to express my real emotions. I wanted to express like going crazy like them but I couldn't do it. I'm jealous for those people who never think like mine.

I'm jealous because I wanted to be too close with other people but my negative thoughts comes first. It appears already on my mind that, "what if that person will not be happy with me around or what if that people will get annoyed if I acted like that?" I have negative thoughts as always that's why they think it's hard for me to approach which is wrong. They didn't know that I'm always curious of what might think about me.

I'm not forcing myself to smile. It never came into my mind to refuse someone who need's my presence. It's not easy to manipulate this kind of attitude. I wanted to feel different but the shyness comes first. It stops me what my mind wanted to do and in place do not belong in the group.

Then as I grow older I learned how to handle it even with this kind of attitude. I changed it by telling them how I feels in situations like that. I never lie about my true feelings in times like that. After explaining it they understood me and accepted me. There was time I felt ashamed to join, they're the one who came to me. There were even time that they forced me to join with them.

I came to conclusion that no one is different. You just need to be true to yourself and accept things like that. Not all people will like you, even if you're shy to join if they don't like you they won't let you join. There's no reason to feel confused of what people's mind. It's not you who is wrong but the people who has judgemental attitude that judges you right away.

Live like them, be crazy like them and most of it be happy like them. Life won't adjust of what kind of life you wanted to be. Let them like you or dislike you. They can't change someone who just wanted to be happy. They don't own your life so they're not the one who will decide what kind of life you must have. Live with no regrets in life and enjoy your life to the fullest.

YOU ARE NOT DIFFERENT, NO ONE IS.

thank you for reading..

image is mine but taken from a friend,
oh, I was separated with the group. I was late of it during giving food. lol

d' dreamboy,
@mrnightmare89