confession story. #16

Female 21
Ktm

"He asked me once ,,what can do for love?"" ""Haha,what a stupid question. i will do nothing "" This was my reply . Yet i proved it .All i did was nothing and let him go . I often wonder, how was i able to gather so much strength that i let the only love of mine go.

I remember the day when he smoked in front of me for the first time . His small yet deep eyes were so lost and although being with me ,he was with his thoughts of me being with someone else .I never wanted to hug him so tight as at that moment but all i could do was look through him . LDR really sucks and words have no warmth .

My god knows what he meant and means in my life and how much loyal i was to him . But he lost himself trying to find what never existed and i lost myself trying to find him . All of this shit made great influence in our individual life . I helped him not to grow . I was unintensionally the reason for his troubles, silent days ,sleeepless horrible nights and undirected future . And he believes his life could have been far better and will be far better if i could have never existed ..
What a strange combination . Someone whom you love the most ,hates you the most .

And then i let him go . May be my love let him go or i loved myself a little more so i let him go . But it seems the time stopped there ,in his last goodbye message with full of hatred . The clouds seems little upset and the rain is no fun The Sun seems pale and there seems always a lunar eclipse. The icecream melts without being finished and the wind reminds me how much he loved whispering -""I love you "".

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