The day my world stood still

I can still remember it like it was yesterday. That feeling that something was going to get down. I have always had these dejavu moments that would feel like a gut punch because you know that shit is going to hit the fan.

I saw them talking in their part of the office. I thank God that I was in a different part because frankly I could not stand how fake their personas are.

Mely, had a higher position and Kim was her underling and partner in crime. They loved playing good cop and bad cop with everyone. Kim was a straight up asshole and bossed everyone and then Mely would swoop in and use her motherly persona to smooth things over.

When they were alone or with their usual lackeys they would talk bad things about people but when they are around these very people they act like perfect angels. How do I know I was part of the inner sanctum.

I watched them think of bad things about people. I watched them think of stories that people wanted to destabilize everything that the owner built. I watched them pour poison to the owner's ear about how certain people were bad apples and needed to be removed. I watched as the owner cut people off even if they have grown close.

I watched and pondered why their lies were being swallowed hook, line and sinker by everyone. I watched as they destroyed people's lives without a care.

They firmly believed that what they were doing was just and for the good of the company. They have wrapped themselves too tight with their lies and justifications that they believe it for the truth.

No one was willing to stand up as people left or was managed out. Their reputation shredded and careers destroyed.

You see they were greedy and selfish. They cultivated a relationship with the owner that they are the only ones that cared about her legacy. No one else should have the ear of L, the owner.

It has become a recurring theme. L wanting to foster relationships tried to get close to people. Unbeknownst to her these two snakes would do anything to discredit the person.

It would start out simple with lates and absences called out. The smallest issues blown out of proportions. I even think that some incidents were carried out by their lackeys in an effort to dirty the accused's name.

I watched all of these unfold and to my shame did not do anything. How many times have I voiced that the office should feel safe when in fact I knew there were two predators in the corporate jungle ready to.pounce on those they consider a threat. Like the ostrich I stuck my head under the sand hoping it just blows over. I was a joke.

I saw in the owner's eyes that she knew what was happening but had grown too attached to these two that there was no way she could cut them off. In a way they were parasites who invaded the host and to kill it was to kill the host.

I saw in her eyes the feelings of helplessness. She turned to me a couple of times and as a courtesy I heard her out but knew the quickest way for career suicide was to get close to her.

I was naive to think that they will not see this. I was naive to think that by keeping low and out of sight that I would not find myself targetted. Boy was I wrong.

Credits to smalltalk.com for the image used.

You know that feeling as your day went that you walked the same path, answered the same emails and talked to the same people. You know that feeling this already happened.

Dejavu is a proper word for it. In a way you dread it as experience taught you, your dejavus are usually bad things happening. It is as if your future self is warning you that shit is going to hit the fan.

When you sit down on one of the conference chairs you know that this is going to be bad. You know because you have given this same talk to others before and it has always made you want to throw out afterwards because you know deep inside that it is wrong.

You look as stacks of paper are in the table. You see a notarized affidavit washing their guilt in the matter. You have been outplayed in a game that you were not playing but was inadvertently joined not by choice but because that's how they do things.

You look dumbfounded on the letter you read and know this is it. You have been dealt the joker card. In some games it is a good card but on the games they play it is the worst possible card.

I place my hands over my temple and sigh heavily. You know how this is going to play out but even knowing that you feel betrayed but then loyalty has no value here. It is those high that mandate the fate of those low in the food chain.

You have now been sacrificed. A day that started normally but gradually giving you dread culminating to a day that I stood still and wept.