Why You Need To Be More Listening When Interacting With Others

By "listening" we mean responding appropriately, being attentive, paying attention, sharing, and responding. It's important to listen because as listeners we can share and respond effectively by providing feedback to the person speaking and being a part of the conversation. We can help by giving feedback and being an active listener.


Learning how to be a responsive listener when learning a new language may seem difficult at first, but it becomes much easier with practice. The first thing to do is to become comfortable with silence. People who are naturally fluent have absolutely no problem with silence. During the very beginning of a conversation they don't want to give other people room to breathe so they will be the most responsive when somebody speaks.

Another way to improve your listening skills is to make sure you are observing the other person and their body language and expression when they speak. Being a good listener means that you are truly observing the other person and how they are speaking. If you are able to pick out even the slightest inflection or change in their vocal inflections, you can tune in to that and respond appropriately. This makes good listening possible. Listen to people with whom you already have a relationship and practice good listening.

Listening requires being a listener first. Once you've mastered good listening you must be able to ignore your own comments and opinions. As listeners, we often criticize those we hear. However, criticism doesn't help anyone get better.

The final step to being a responsive listener is to listen with an openness that allows you to receive. The Alexander technique is based on the idea that we receive more from our own behaviors than our hearth. In this theory, anyone can become a great listener. If you practice listening with the Alexander technique consistently, you'll find that you're listening more effectively and you'll be able to receive more than you give.

What do you do when you don't want to listen? When a speaker addresses a group, you could choose to walk away or to tune out. However, if you are trying to improve your listening skills through deep focus, listening may be harder than it seems. For some, the idea of having to tune out during an important discussion is frightening.

One way to learn to listen more effectively is to make sure you have as much control over the environment as possible. If the audience is being held at the same time as the presentation, request that everyone leave except for the speakers. If you're giving a workshop in a classroom setting, ask that all seating be taken out so that the room can be clear for the speaker. Take note, however, that sometimes just hearing someone talking can be distracting. So if there are distractions, just take notice and then politely turn it around.

One effective way of ensuring that you are more attentive and that you'll be able to listen more effectively is to think about what you are focusing on when you listen. Sometimes, a person may be talking and they are focused on their own words. For example, if you're listening to a presentation by someone who is doing his best to ensure that all of his or her ideas are well-thought-out, you may be totally focused on the presentation itself and what the speaker is saying. This makes it difficult to listen to the speaker and to really understand what he or she is trying to say. It's much better to pay attention to the things that the speaker is saying and to try and figure out how he or she is communicating his or her message. If you can find ways to focus on the speaker's ideas without necessarily listening to everything that is being said, then you will learn to be a better listener.