Have You Seen My Missing Washcloths?

                                                   

I'm not sure exactly what happens, because one day, they're nesting all cozily together in the bathroom cabinet, and one by one they begin to disappear.  This happens so gradually, that I'm only aware of it when I try to find one, think they're all in the laundry basket waiting to be laundered, and poof! I find they're nowhere to be found. Not behind my son's bedroom door, huddling in terror at the smell of shoes that have died, or jockstraps and underwear that have sprouted mold-lings. (He doesn't eat veggies, so I know the green stuff didn't start as green stuff earlier in its life.) The washcloths are not under the couch, although I would be mystified as to how that could happen in the first place. They're not in the bathroom, which would be THE logical place to find them. (It's my experience that washcloths are not that logical to begin with.) And they're not in the kitchen pulling double duty in the sink.

                                    

I considered putting tracking devices on them, but it seemed inhumane, and I didn't want them to think I didn't trust them, right? It's not like they are socks, which are always looking for an opportunity to split--and join up with other socks just looking for a good time.

                    

So where the heck do they all go? Some possibilities:

• They've been abducted by a cult and are now slaving away in a third world country where people have mistaken them for hand towels because they don't speak the language.
• They heard of another home in the neighborhood where life was easy and they could get in lots of pool time.
• They slip out unnoticed one by one late at night and run away from home. Then, having to make their own way in the world, they find it's not that easy and have resorted to standing on street corners flagging people down just to get a little attention. If you know what I mean.

courtesy of onesockbox.com

I've never mistreated my washcloths, so I can't imagine them voluntarily leaving home. Most of them were quiet and obedient, and never expressed any desire to be anywhere else.  If you see them, tell them I miss them and wish they'd come home.