Make day funny (2987b)

Sharp and short! **Husband** : I love you! **Wife** : Not today!

7: Where are you and Mom going tonight? Me: To meet with your teacher. 7: Oh, you don't need to. I already saw her today.

When my husband brags that girls hit on him at work, I just remind him that I make more money than him. We both go to bed happy.

Wife: ""I've made the chicken soup"" ""Thank god for that. I thought we had to eat it!""

Chuck Norris has never been in a fight, ever. Do you call one roundhouse kick to the face a fight?