Make day funny (1038h)

My family crest is just a photo of someone letting it go to voicemail.

Did you hear about that synthetic type of weed they made using dog hair? Instead of k2, they call it k9.

Whenever I hear kids singing..... Whenever I hear kids singing ""do re mi"" I picture Chris Hansen is hiding in the room somewhere.

Don't lye. It makes you basic.

Why did the baker have brown hands? Because he kneaded a shit.