Alternate Universe Number 3 -5minutefreewrite(x3) Comedy Open Mic 46

in #freewrite5 years ago

I left the house, feeling like a piano had been dropped on my head. The taxi stood waiting for me.

What an incredible journey, I thought to myself. I was in an alternate reality, I befriended unicorns, I went to the first Bar Mitzvah... Wow. But it's always good to get home from vacation. I wonder how much time has passed.

As I stepped up onto the porch of my walk-up, I could see the newspaper waiting there for me.

Oh, I was gone four days. Just like it had felt in the alternate reality. Hm. I was expecting it to be either longer or shorter. That's a decent length for a vacation, I guess.

"Welcome back, Jessie!" exclaimed my roommate, Vince. There was nothing unexpected about him. I kind of thought there would be a little something off about everyone, like I would have returned to a near-identical universe. Maybe money would look different, like we had a different president on the $20 bill or something. Just a little something.

I spent two days looking for something to be off. But nothing was. I wasn't exactly surprised at how disappointed I was, but I was a little bit worried that I was so disappointed that things were not how I didn't expect them to be.

I stopped by the magic travel agency. It was still there. It hadn't disappeared or anything. I went in. "W

The only forces now in play were the hurricane winds flinging everything in their way towards their shelter

"Yep, it's hurricane season." Those were the words I was worried I would hear from the weather people on the news. It was, indeed, hurricane season in Florida. The magical travel agency had the news on in the background. Clara, from whom I had booked my magical adventure was there. "Oh, hello, Jessie! You just got back? How was it?"

"It was everything you promised. I imagine there was some fine print I didn't read, and now you're going to harvest my soul or something?"

Clara cocked her head to one side. "No. No. You paid in full via credit card. Now, of course, if you dispute those charges-"

"Aha! then you'll throw me into a hell-dimension!"

"No, then we'll have to send it to collections, and there could be some serious consequences."

"A post-apocalyptic bounty hunter will chase me to the ends of the earth!"

"Um, no. It would probably negatively impact your credit rating, and you'd still be liable for the charges. But you said everything was fine?"

"Oh. Oh yeah. I was just... expecting something to be different when I got back."

"I don't mean to overstep, but... it's just a vacation."

Make up now optional.

AHA! That was something different. I was sitting at work, and I opened my email, and there it said it in bold. Our receptionists no longer were required to wear make-up. Something had changed! It was an old rule from when the company had been founded. An artifact of the 1950s. And here we were in 2019 changing the past. Kind of. Janice from head office had been taking more classes at the community college. She had her masters, but she liked to keep learning. It's a lifetime of learning, she'd always say. She'd been hanging out with the millennials who thought requiring make-up was a pretty outdated bit of sexism.

Or maybe it was because this was an alternate universe. I leaned back in my swivel chair, satisfied. I'd figured out what was different. This wasn't my universe, clearly. This was a different universe. Any day now, someone who looked just like me would show up and demand their life back, the one that I was now living. That would be exciting. It was almost time for my lunch break. I thought I'd take a nap.

I rested my head on my tentacles and fell asleep.

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Hi improv,

Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
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I feel now like a piano had been dropped on my head :D I've never heard about something like that before, but now it all makes sense when you say it..

It sounds like a Harry Potter who just figured out that he was a wizard but it wouldn't somehow meet up his expectations until the moment when he rested his head on his tentacles and fell asleep :D

That last sentence really made me chuckle :D I can't think of any better ending of this story :)

Thank you for sharing and good luck with the open mic ;)

haha! I'm so glad to see that wearing make-up became optional in the alternate universe.

I rested my head on my tentacles and fell asleep.

Nope, nothing strange here. lol. I wonder if he realized he'd change or was he always some form of creature.

Hi improv,

This post has been upvoted by the Curie community curation project and associated vote trail as exceptional content (human curated and reviewed). Have a great day :)

Visit curiesteem.com or join the Curie Discord community to learn more.

Whaaaat? That's some perspective changer.
That ending is the kind of punch that send one back to reread the whole thing once and again.
Great narrative technique

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This post has received a 3.13 % upvote from @drotto thanks to: @sbi-booster.

I just became a piano after reading your blog. Everything in there is awesome and I enjoyed myself a lot. Waiting to see more of you.. Great post handsome

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hahahaha
I'm hope the tentacles were comfy :)
Ok, so just got back from vacation too... and lost a day...
So I am pretty sure you have already worked on the prompt, so let me give you an invitation instead :)
110B1F42-8D0B-4FF1-8AFC-71A942555793.PNG

Hey, hope you are having a nice day!

We stopped by to invite you to participate in the "B&W Photography contest", "'Dream' -- 100 words free writing contest", and "Food Photography #2 contest", and win prizes worth 18 Steem!

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