I don’t think love “has become” or is “becoming fake”. In all epochs there have been instances of fake or superficial relationships either based on arranged marriages, which are still practiced in many cultures, or based on material interest. There are many reasons for a man or a woman to marry or be with a significant other without being in love. In any case, what we may identify these days is a diversification, proliferation, and massive diffusion of ways in which relationships can look fake or aim at the wrong goals. The media promotion of love/romance “standards” and youth’s following of those trends is what should worry us. If anything, love and romance have been forced into a social-network straightjacket.

Global communications and pop culture have contributed to establishing what we may call new “values” that young people are taking as models. Celebrities have been the center of attention and the youths (at least some of them) look at these (artificial) people as models. They aspire to mimic their romances and dramas. They even aim at looking like them. They follow their reality shows as if that were a reflection of real life and start living accordingly, which causes some more reality shows to emerge out of the report of these fake lives which are a reflection of the “original” fakeness.

The ephemerality of a relationship, its scandals and downfall seem to capture audiences’ attention more effectively than a story of a stable marriage and a successful family. We see social networks echoing mainstream media coverage of the dramas and whims of celebrities, especially when the break with their partners and get new ones. Stability and mental sanity does not sell.

Social networks have even established new rule of engagement or etiquette. The selfies, the likes and love, the tagging and the followings have substituted real interaction and have provided additional dramas to what may be a regular relationship. The inability or unwillingness to follow social networks etiquette can be now a source of conflict and considering the outrageous amount of time people devote now to those forums, no wonder we have so many conflicting relationships now.

What we see in this globalized world is an over emphasis on individualism. So, of course, when we compared the values that move people now with those of past generations we see that self-sacrifice or settling for less than our personal aspirations are not qualities to be encouraged. We know how difficult to make a love relationship work is and how important negotiation and sacrifice are, thus, if those values are not among the ones being displayed and encourage by the media, most love relationships now will resemble the ephemeral ones impersonated by media celebrities.

Our globalized world has made different kinds of false love more visible and has probably instituted new forms of superficiality that have contributed to making love relationships even more unstable. I remember, some years ago, watching this commercial about a diamond company or jewelry. In the commercial the man declares his love aloud in the middle of the street; “I love this woman!” he yells. The woman is embarrassed and wants to run away until she sees the “stone”. Then, she murmurs “I love this man!” and you can almost hear her meaning “this stone.”

Thus, today’s idea of love and romance is all about materiality, shopping sprees, traveling, social acceptance, popularity, drama and all that. Some of this already existed in periods past, only that drama was reserved to the upper classes. The democratization of technology and social networks also democratized vanity, superficiality, and melodrama.