Another Day Of Remembering The Struggle

We are a bit stressed out here. Over life work situation. Did more work for an insurance job and didn't get paid. Very scary. It is a harsh feeling to know your livelihood relies on other people. Even if you do a great job someone can say they don't like it in a power trip and you have not much control. I still remember droning out all these years just struggling. You just work and have no time for anything else. At those times it seems there is no friends, no one who cares, no one to help you.

So then I keep gaining self expressive means. No matter how tired, burned out, frustrated or totally stressed. Gotta write words on paper, even talk to people if they don't completely get you. Express it. At least understand where you stand yourself and don't be duped by others power trip opinions. There are allot of depressed people in a crabs in a bucket scenario. Don't let them get to you.

Well my dry hand condition is almost totally clear. Just eating right and taking care boosts you forward. It is cost and time consuming to take care of yourself. That's the fight, to not let the grind of the busy body 9 to 5 life make it too difficult and distracting to take care of yourself. I never had a 9 to 5 haha. Construction was more independent. Still a grind where all these people can mess you over. Having to make calls to the organization you work for to try to get paid what you deserve is a stress job in itself. It seems when things go wrong they can really go wrong. I want life to go right for once!!

Alright well getting back to it! Glad to be getting up earlier lately for work. This is a local job, not scared at not getting paid as much. I will have all day to reflect on my life and situation as I work today. All in all I do feel good. I go over these kinda thoughts in the morning. Trying to work through.