ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAST IS TO BE NORMAL

Hi my name is Ryan, I am 32 years old and was born with a genetic disorder called Neurofibromatosis - it is essentially the same condition that the elephant man had, but in my case it is a little more mild. Nevertheless, this condition has impacted every facet of my life, from the day I was born until now. From not being able to get a job in the field I studied so hard to graduate at the top of class in- accountancy, to finding a friend, let alone a mate that would be willing to spend time with me, without being weirded out or disgusted.

It is sad, but in my 32 years on this planet - besides my own direct family - my extended family makes fun of me all the time and is embarrassed by me, I haven't met a single person that hasn't made fund of me, either to my face or behind my back. Sadly, every day I go out, ridicule is something I have to endure - it is just a part of my life. If it wasn't for the self-checkout aisle that exists in many stores today, I do not know how I would make it through the days.

Sadly, I see so many people my age on here talking about their families and significant other's and how they don't have enough toys for Christmas or sadly in someone cases any. But in another breath, it is sad that a lot of these people don't realize that they have the greatest gift of all, each other. Even if I was able to find someone that could see me for me, because of my condition, I will never know the beauty of what it is like to have a child. Many Christmas's when I was younger I would prey that " maybe next year" I would have someone to come home to, someone the exchange gifts with and tell each other I love you. But eventually those thoughts and desires diminished and I came to the realization that, that was never going to happen.

So here I stand, another here older, still reading the same posts as I did the year before, but this year seeing that there were so many, I deiced to take action. Because for some people, I think it is important for them to understand that there are people like me out there that go 10, 20 , 30 years or even a lifetime, without experiencing the caressing touch or warmth of another human being. That there are people like me that have spent the last 15 years celebrating Christmas alone at some dimly lit Chinese food restaurant - because they seem to be the only thing open on Christmas day.

Some years I think to myself, amongst a sea of Chinese people who for the most part don't celebrate Christmas in the same fashion that western society does, do these people ever question why I am the only single white person eating dinner alone on Christmas day? Then reality sets in and all you have to do is take one good look at me and it all makes sense.

So in summation, though you may have not got all the gifts you wanted this year, at least you can be thankful for the fact that you don't have my burden or the burden of some poor soul that has it even worse. So moving forward, I can only find solace in fact that at least I can still feed myself and drive and I hope that you can find that same comfort in the fact that at least you have someone to hold this Christmas , someone to share life's great moments with, because poverty is only a state of mind and true-love is eternal.

If you want to donate something to me, please go ahead, if not, your kind words, similar experiences or simply learning from my story is gratitude enough. I am currently unemployed, but I am really not expecting anything from this. Sometimes being able to share your story and have someone read it, is a gift in its self.

https://www.gofundme.com/all-i-want-for-christmas-is-to-be-normal

Merry Christmas.