WOMAN WITH NO DIGNITY

**I made a grave mistake **
Put on ur clothes came the harsh voice pulling me out of my thoughts. With a lot on my mind, I pretended not to pay attention. I could hear my heart beating, my mind racing. All I could think of was what I had just done to myself.
Put on ur clothes came the voice again, this time a lot harsher and irritated. Slowly I turned around looking with disbelief at the man who spoke them. He looked disgusted. Wondering if I was imagining things.
Nooo.... I was not. I just made love to this man. The same man who flipped me over in bed, the man who groaned and moaned in my arms pushing his nails deep into my flesh, the man who had just taken himself to cloud 9.
I got up, walking towards the bathroom to clean up the voice came again
Don't bother, I won't have time to wait
Why? I asked
He glared at me asking "What do you want to do that can't wait?" I have an appointment, get dressed.

I picked up my jean trousers, stretching out my long legs, I slid it on. Gently I placed my bra on my well rounded breasts, hooking it firmly.
Whats with the tears? Why are u crying?
At that moment, I realised I was crying and quickly brushed the back of my palm against my face saying nothing. Determined to make me feel even worse than a prostitute, he continued, Were you forced? Did u not enjoy it?
At that instant, I flashed back the last 40 minutes of my life and felt like killing myself. He hissed, picked up his keys, threw a few dollar bills on the dresser and left. My blood raged, I wanted to scream, run after him, hit him, do something but the more I tried to move, the heavier my legs seemed. I was stuck. I fell into bed and cried bitterly.

I met Zoran at a Film house. I had just gotten out of College. He was friendly and extremely jovial. He seemed intelligent and knew the right words to use at the right time. We got friendly and I enjoyed his company. I was in a serious relationship at the time so the thought of getting intimate with him never crossed my mind. We kept in touch and I got married 3 months after.
Today (2 weeks after my wedding)I was meeting a childhood friend at Catherina Hotel. While waiting at the lobby, I heard a familiar voice call. He looked so macho and the voice very manly.
We got talking, trying to catch up on old times. He was attending a wedding. Had just gotten back from the Carribeans, a place I was saving to visit.
He suggested we go up to his room as the hotel lobby had gotten noisy after a man proposed to his woman.

The room was exquisite and smelt of affluence. He gave me an iPad and I got to feeding my eyes. Few minutes later, he handed me a glass of wine and a box of chocolate. I got to asking questions about the women in the pictures. The talk got heated and initimate, then came soul music. His lips found mine, I held back. They were soft and sweet. I resisted but he keep up the face. Slowly his hands moved found my waist and he grabbed me close to him, my heart racing, my breasts yearning, I opened my mouth and kissed him like I was holding on for dear life.
Zoran found my blouse zip and tried to unzip it, I did not stop him..... For a minute I thought I was dreaming. I must have been in my head until I felt him hard and strong inside me, Oh how good it felt... How different!.... How macho!
A moan escaped my lips, and then another..

The horn of the taxi driver brought me back to reality. I paid the fare and alighted. Once inside the house, I headed for the shower, undressed and got in determined to wash every trace of infidelity off my body. The sound of running water felt so good as I scrubbed hard at my skin.

My mind racing everywhere, thoughts going through my mind when I heard a male voice, a voice I knew so well
"Why are you scrubbing so hard?
I put on a fake smile trying to mask my guilt only then did I realize that he was naked...

Standing by the tub was a naked husband with no idea what I had just done.
At this moment, I knew what I had to do, what I had to hide and who I had to be. "A WOMAN WITH NO DIGNITY "

Images source: pixabay