Self-Serving or Not? Giving and Paying it Forward Without the Expectation of a Return
In the course of my morning reading, I'm once again reminded that one of my favorite things about the Steemit ecosystem is this idea that we are basically part of a "Gift Economy," and what we do here is a giant version of "Paying it Forward."
Is it Even POSSIBLE?
Thinking about that-- and about a few posts I've read-- makes me consider the oft-raised question of whether it is even possible to act in a way that isn't ultimately self-serving.
Aspens near Estes Park, CO
That may seem like a simple question, at least on the surface.
Many of my Libertarian friends would argue that humans act in their self-interest, period.
There are certainly elements of truth to that, even as we sometimes disagree. When I sit with any of my "socialist leanings," they are ultimately self-serving: When I say I support something like Universal Basic Income, what I am really saying is that I support a world in which we minimize hardscrabble poverty because if everyone has housing and food, they are less likely to break into my place and steal my stuff.
Sure, it's a humanitarian endeavor, but it's also about self-protection.
Giving to Get?
On Steemit, we give people upvotes, which essentially "cost" us nothing while helping out someone else. These are-- on some level-- "gifts."
Purple wildflower
But what about the "Pay it Forward" idea?
Is that "giving without expectations?" Well, technically speaking, not really... when we give something and say "pay it forward" there IS an expectation of future reciprocity. Not necessarily for ourselves, but in some version of the-great-big-ledger-of-the-universe being in balance.
What's my point here? Much as we like to think otherwise, true altruism is actually a pretty rare thing.
Now don't get me wrong: not being truly altruistic doesn't make is bad people! I'm just exploring the dynamic, here.
So, I found myself looking a bit at my own upvote pattern. Why do we vote for certain posts and not for others? Why do some get a 100% upvote and others 5%? Is that upvote more of a "transaction," or simply a tip of the hat to someone?
Fuchsias in the rain
And then, of course, we make friends... and we tend to favor our friends, regardless of whether we're here in virtual space, or in our neighborhood at home.
Recently, I gave away a working refrigerator to someone who needed it. It was a "win-win." They needed a fridge, and I wanted the damn thing out of the garage because I need the space to build shelves for an extended art studio. Altruistic or self-serving? Or Both?
Again, I don't believe there are any "right" or "wrong" answers here. I'm just exploring some of our deeper motivations. WHY do we do what we do? Do we give our motivations names that actually aren't technically TRUE? Not that it makes us "bad" people. Just something to think about, on this Saturday morning! Or evening, in some parts of the world...
What do YOU think? Gifting and Paying it forward is a great idea, but is it actually selfless? When we act in a supposedly altruistic manner, do we "secretly" expect something in return? Is Steemit a worthy experiment of "paying it forward," the way our upvote system works? Do you consider yourself more self-serving or more altruistic? Leave a comment-- share your experiences-- be part of the conversation!
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Created at 180203 10:17 PST
When you give something with no expectation of return....you get a return.
You feel good about yourself.
Many (most...all) people would do a LOT to feel good about themselves.
as for the Gift Economy...
odd you should mention that...living in the NorthWest US.
it's been done.
Potlatch
a precursor of a post-scarcity economy?
Ah yes, the Potlatch-- hadn't considered that, in the context of gift economies, but the tradition certainly had some interesting social wisdom built in.
Status was bestowed on those who gave a Potlatch. Imagine a modern equivalent in the corporatocracy where status would be bestowed on the elite for their gifting, rather than for the size of their stock portfolio. Might make for a different kind of world.
imagine a world in which everyone has a replicator.
Interesting topic. I’ve taken classes in the past that have discussed this. For me it’s natural to think about “what’s in it for me?” The older I get I try to consciously give just for the sake of giving with nothing expected in return. But ultimately is am I doing it because it makes me feel good about myself, thus still getting something in return? It can make your head spin 🙂
The IS there something in it for me thought can easily become a snake chasing its own tail, especially when you start thinking about whether "feeling good" as a result of taking an action constitutes "something."
I can easily forego a financial, in-kind or status reward but there's always the "it makes me happy to see that this other person is happy" reward.
So true!
I literally wrote a post today about good deeds , people expect too much and don’t really wanna help others out .
I'll check out your post; it does often seem like a lot of so-called "good works" are more a case of "giving to GET." Or to "look good" in the eyes of the public.
I would go even further and say that true altruism doesn't actually exist at all. I think that even people who do good deeds without expecting anything from anyone in return are doing it because they have an instinctive urge to help and a feeling of guild if they don't. Thus, it can be argued that their "truly altruistic" deeds are also ultimately self-serving - their deeds make them feel good and prevent them from feeling guilty.
I think it is a natural tendency to support people we seem to have a bond with or we typically agree with. I mean it would feel odd to me to support someone that is drastically opposed to everything I hold dear. I think there is a familiarity about seeing someone around for a good while and observing that they are a decent Steemer (for example, as I feel about you) . Then it is naturally a comfortable and even good feeling that my vote is supporting someone else that cares about the good of Steemit.
you are right @denmarkguy i should be done in this way
thanks for this writing ... which will help me
thank you for shareing
Thanks for you great Pic and for great words.Life is not always colorful, but it can still be fun.Hope colorful and fun days for all.upvoted
that's pretty cool to know
I do my best, try to be kind and help where I can. On steemit it is hard because there is a material gain with most thing you so here. I'm remembering the words of Meher Baba:
Selfless service consists in rendering service to others with no thought of gain, reward, or result; it is free from the thought of placing others under obligation. In serving a fellow human being in the spirit of spontaneous, selfless love, one does not put him under obligation. On the contrary, the one helped confers upon the helper the blessing of an opportunity to serve his own true self.
(from SILENT TEACHINGS OF MEHER BABA, pp. 61-62, ed Naosherwan Anzar
2001 © Avatar Meher Baba Perpetual Public Charitable Trust)
In speaking on altruism, where someone cares so much about others that they forget about themselves, I believe that it does exist. Not to be confused with modern martyrdom, where someone is disillusioned to believe that their sacrifice will save others, thus placing them in a seat of importance.
I would imagine a person with strong altruistic values, not feeling any pain nor excitement in performing deeds. This would be the difference between feeling great joy in improving someone's situation versus feeling joy that a person's situation has improved.
In a sense, many are narcissistic do-gooders, until the "I" involved is done away with. True altruism is anonymous.