CAN WE STILL TRUST OUR MALE FRIENDS??*

CAN WE STILL TRUST OUR MALE FRIENDS??

Sometimes, gifts are wrapped up in uncertainties and absurdities but will people choose the latter over the former or the former above the latter? Many a time , we trust and are certain of a particular being behaviour based on the theory of "we have been together for long to know their folly and strength "
It can evidently be said that meeting people and conversing with them in the timeframe of some hours makes you think a safe haven has been reached even when we know the tongue can be deceptive and humans generally tend to deceive.
There are issues of gender friendship between opposite sex who derive better bonds of mutual friendship to same sex friendship, many are of the opinion of " I grew among guys , so I love being around them" "Guys makes me feel more secured than my fellow female friends and I can discuss anything with them" " Sometimes males give me tips to sustain my relationship" while some may be forced to seek solace in the warmth friendship of a male if they never enjoyed or had access to the love of a brother at home.
Basically, these may be the excuses put up by females with no string attached but there has been various stories that touch especially when the females ends up falling in lust with the so called male friend or when her spouse discourages her from having a male best friend.
Is it rampant amongst boys to have females as friends? Of course but not as high as amongst the females. The society we live invariably forestall the 'close friendship ' of two opposite sex believing it is an act of indiscipline or indecency and being uncultured. Well cases of Abuses, Incest and Rape are relevant examples. Even parents warn their female children to ward off the opposite sex until they are ready for a serious relationship
Okay! What about our day to day talks in schools and other places in the societies? Are we also to run away from the males until we are ready for relationships??
Trust; a strong confidence and reliance on someone, a commitment and a total belief in something,. Do people /we/you still trust? . In a university environment where everyone (either male or female) can supposedly 'crash ' at another's place either announced or unannounced does not and should not spark up dissension amongst people, for everyone has that major beliefs or another that guards and uphold them, we are not all as rigid and stringent as others!!
Statistical hypothesis shows every female has an iota of doubt or wariness of the motives of the opposite sex who is either a friend, lover or an admirer.
Being one who is free with the opposite sex and carving a supposed niche of those who I felt I was safe with visited a fellow male friend who had always insisted I visited him, even if it was just once. On a palm Sunday which almost became a harm Sunday, I did visited and was greeted with two packs of condoms after the pleasantries. Amidst fright, diplomacy and prayers, I was able to manoeuvre my way out of the situation. After several apologies and little talks, I gathered that sex was just a plaything for him even when he insisted keeping condoms shouldn't Mar his personality before me as he expects and believes me to be matured. But is that maturity? Thinking with your genitals, inviting female friends over and ignoring the facts that they are not figments for sexual arousal?? And if refused, will you want to force down yourself on them?
Many out there have their own experiences (mine was a new and first experience) , ranging from abuses from relatives (uncles), family friends and even friends. Opening my mouth to tell people of such experience, I realise it was not something new but I have just be naive in my own world. Now the out cry is I DON'T TRUST GUYS.
I perceive that, as some people read this piece, they may be of the opinion of; did the lady not go to the male house herself? Was she forced? What did she expect? A ball room dance? The truth remains that I have Trusted! Will I still be able to trust my male friends?
Would my lover be able to handle this truth? Won't he disgust him? Won't I disgust him? Will the simple gesture of a male touch on my skin not disgust me now?

#we are not figment of arousals
#Help us trust you#
Adedeji Adeola