WOMEN LOVE SPECIAL ATTENTION

Somewhere out there, a woman is planning to turn me into a house boy and make my life miserable when she takes in with our baby.
To become very sick in the morning, vomiting and spitting everywhere and cause me to do the chores, bring her breakfast in bed and go late to work.
To always crave for impossible and delicious treats so that I'm either going to fast food joints all the time or traveling across seven kingdoms and seven seas to find her some alien traditional delicacy.
To fake cramps when she can't sleep at night and wake me to massage her feet or just admire her swollen breasts because I cannot be snoring when she's having insomnia.
To make me feel guilty about dressing smart and looking all fit and pruned because I cannot be in form while she's looking like a bloated penguin when I'm the one that put her in the condition.
Open the door for me
Get me Sandy water
I want to eat nzu
Clean my shoes
Do this, do that..
I'm just letting you know that I know about your ploys and blackmails and that I will willingly play the fool but then, I'll be waiting for you after your omugwo, I will not do pim in that house, not even raise my hand to kill a mosquito.