WHO DO YOU GO OUT WITH?

Months ago,I travelled to Portharcourt,while on the road I decided to see a movie in order to keep myself busy,in the movie, A university student was dating an armed robber. One day she went to his house without informing him and badged in on him and his gang members celebrating after a robbery.

They had their guns and the money they stole on display.
The gang members said they must kill her because she had found out their secret. Her boyfriend pleaded with them but they didn't listen.

Meanwhile, she had told her brother where she was going. So he tried to call her but she couldn't pick her call because the gang members wouldn't let her answer her phone

Her brother was worried and called the boyfriend to ask if his sister was there. They boyfriend lied but the girl screamed and the boyfriend tried to cover up by saying she just arrived. Her boyfriend gave her the phone to speak to her brother but she was warned to say everything was okay.

Her brother suspected there was a problem from her voice but she had to cover up. They later killed her and her boyfriend called her family to say that he was robbed and the robbers tried to rape her but she resisted so they shot her.

But her brother wasn't satisfied. He was still suspicious of the boyfriend. To cut the long story short, the girl's mother went to a native priest and asked him to make her daughter haunt the killer and make the person confess. The boyfriend confessed and was arrested.

I’m not in support of the mum visiting a native priest. Imagine if the girl was dating that guy but didn't tell anyone. Imagine if her brother didn't have his number. Imagine if she hadn't told her brother where she was going to. They would have killed her and thrown her body away and no one will have any clue who killed her. Her body may not have even been found.

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Still some months ago, I watched "Lies of the heart" on Zee World. A lady went to her fiancé's house and afterwards they took a walk. They were both attacked on the way.
When it was late and she hadn't returned, her mother called her fiancé's mother to say her fiancé hadn't dropped her daughter at home.

The mother said her son had gone to drop off his fiancée at her parents' house. Nobody could reach them on phone.
When they went to the police station to report, the police said may be she was out having fun with her fiancé. But her family said they were sure she's in danger because she had never been out of the house for so long without informing them.

We live in an insecure and unsafe world.If you are too secretive, you'll be in danger and no one will even know. You are going out on a date or with a friend and no one knows where you are going to and who you are going out with and what time to expect you back. You are doing yourself more harm than good. Even when you are going alone, you should let those close to you know where you are going to and what time to expect you back.

You are in a relationship and nobody knows who you are in a relationship with or anything about the person. Your family at least should know the person's name, house address and phone number.

Without even going too far, does your family know your friends? You are staying far away from your parents and your parents don't know anyone they can reach if they can't reach you.

Your roommates should be aware of your where about sometimes. You should have a few close friends among your roommates; people that will raise an alarm if you don't return to the room and if they can't reach you.

Don't just pack your back and travel somewhere without informing your roommates. What if something bad happens? If you aren't going to be back to the room for some days, let someone know.

In summary;

1. Avoid being in secret relationships and friendships. Let your family and close friends know who you are in a relationship with. Let your family know your friends.

2. Be accountable to someone or a group of people. Let those close to you know where you are going to, who you are going out with and what time you will be back. If you are travelling, let those who are close to you know where you are travelling to, where you will be staying/who you will be staying with during that period and when you are expected to come back. Call or text to inform them when you take off and when you have arrived your destination.

3. When going out, carry a phone and ensure that you have enough airtime to call at least one person in case of an emergency.

Finally, this doesn’t mean posting your itinerary or details about your relationship and friendships on social media. Pick a few close and trusted family and friends to share these with.