Easy Life, Hard Knocks

I have always seen the world through my lens and world view, not always a broader one. But age and time and travel have a unique way of transforming those perspectives, crafting a continuously evolving web of life. The key to doing he most good and benefitting most from it is keeping an open mind and open heart, both closely woven together. You know, the whole quantum entanglement and heart-brain thing....

During the regular weekly service his morning, our Pastor spoke on the Ups and Downs of life. How we chart them. How they affect us. How we respond to them. And alongside his message were so many Proverbs, passages from Ecclesiastes, even a strong connection to Kings 1 and 2.

So it got me thinking as Sunday’s always do. I’m grateful for the macro-evolution of my timeline. I am not the same old dirtbag I once was. Mean, cruel, judgmental, cynical, hard hearted, ice cold, untouchable, unloving and uncaring. Rather, the wretched times have worn most of that away and by virtue of experience I now have tremendous empathy. And I love to step in and help someone win or succeed because I know the power that comes in pulling up one’s bootstraps.

My mother helped me see how I didn’t want to raise children and while I forgive her, I also expressly thank her for allowing me to launch into the world and think freely. As parents we all do the best we can. And her good traits I still bear, since the discipline and hard charging and relentless pursuit have helped a great deal. And let’s face it, she is my mother. In the deepest part of me I need to love her and she needs to be loved.

My first marriage ended in divorce but I have forgiven him and actually find much gratitude to the world for helping him get solid and sober and find a kind woman who would love and accept that particular affection. Yep, it hurt, but now I have deep empathy for someone who loses a spouse in any way....it is a searing loss. And finding the road again after such a diversion is not easy, not to mention the financial wrath and psychological setbacks.

I failed in an early pursuit to medical school but what became of my career and adventures and opportunities that followed - render me so unbelievably grateful. My life is a blast! And I am very adept and teachable. What I have is worth more than any degree because it is a complete satisfaction in myself as a created person, an individual, and a tenacity that still sticks in middle age. I will retire when I expire but am also thankful to be in a debt free position in life to enjoy giving my prime to educating kids and helping those in need. It’s a kindly way to put positive energy back into a fledgling universe.

Ups and downs. Some are easy - usually the ups when you’ve achieved and celebrated them! Others are taxing on every level - usually life’s pits and valleys. At the top, I try to savor the moments and express my thanks to God. To write them, remember, hang on to those. Because downs are not ‘ifs’. They do come. We have had our fair share in a young seven years of being married. But as the year winds around to our Anniversary, I see where the ups have pulled us out of the pits. I see where God was. But it is hard to fish in muddy waters (an old Chinese Proverb). So it is hard to see God, to hear Him, to spend silent time together when life is a muddy muddled mess.

That’s basically my takeaway from the sermon. But my goodness! If you think back to King Solomon, he was a bit of an underdog at first and eventually became a prolific writer, philosopher and king. He left us so much wisdom - remember that was what he asked God for! Not an iota of that has steered me wrong.

Hills and valleys.

I hope you find encouragement in the Word!