Making Time for Elderly Family Members this Winter
Life Is busy...I know, believe me I do. But we all get older, if we are lucky enough! And who likes the thought of being isolated or forgotten about? Not me that is for sure...
The one thing that makes me worry at this time of year is how my Grandparents are coping.
My Grandma is 85 years old, she has Alzheimer's and Dementia and lives in a semi-warden aided flat by herself. My Granddad and Nanna live in a bungalow together, my Granddad is 93 years old and my Nanna is 80.
When I was a child, my grandparents would come to see us every weekend and they would take us out to places and teach us different games like domino's and cards. My Granddad would often lie on the floor with us and colour in our colouring books with us! I have fond memories of my childhood with my grandparents.
Since growing up and having a family of my own, I have gone months without seeing them. This is not intentional, but before you know it, days turn into weeks and weeks turn into months. I know this is not an acceptable excuse, but it is the truth.
I really want to spend more time with them but it is so hard when it has been so long since you have seen them to just turn up on their doorstep and say 'Hi!' I am sure I can't be the only one who feels this way.
I guess Christmas is the perfect excuse to turn up out of the blue, I could take over their gift, nice and early to break the awkwardness that I know I shouldn't feel, but I do.
My Grandma is especially vulnerable and I don't live all that far away from her and I have been taking her to hospital appointments with my mum because mum can't push Grandma in her wheelchair. But I know I need to make more social visits too.
We need to remember that they will not be around forever. My grandparents are a good age now, so I am lucky to still have them. I need to make time for them whilst I still can.
This winter, I am making an extra effort to see my grandparents more regularly. I can offer to do shopping for them, take them out for the day now that they cannot drive, or just visit for a cuppa. I know that my grandparents won't struggle with heating, because they are catered for in this respect, however the cold weather still affects them. They cannot walk outside on icy floors for example, it is too dangerous. I need to step up and make more of an effort to help them to get out and about, or do running' here and there' chores.
Have you thought about your elderly relatives recently? I think it is time we all stopped and thought for a second...
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Awwww, you're super lovely! All m grandparents have passed away and so I fully support putting the effort in while you can! Dementia and Alzheimer's really are the scariest afflictions to me, it must be extremely tough to deal with sometimes, so good on you for looking after them!
thank you, yes it is really upsetting to see my Grandma going through this because she has always been so independent. She has owned and ran her own busnisses when she was younger and has traveled the world on her own. Now she can't even leave the flat on her own. It is an awful disease.
It honestly sounds like the worst.
My family has no history of this disease but I still try and give as much as I can to charities working towards a cure or management because I can't imagine watching a loved-one suffer from it. It does sound like your Grandparents have had a pretty great life together, and I hope they still get enjoyable moments, especially when their Granddaughter gets to visit.
Oh yes :) They still love life!
Aww, you're a good granddaughter.
Thank you @choogirl, I could be better though, and I am to make the effort :)
How sweet, i read it and love it..it is very interesting to see some still care about their grandparents ...have a good day..
Thank you @Dylen, it is hard when you have a family of your own to look after, but we must remember that they looked after us too! Where would we be without them! :)
My mother had dementia as well and it's definitely not a nice illness to have (is there ever a nice illness to have 🤔). On the face of it, they look fine, but sometimes their irrational behaviour can upset or annoy those who don't understand the issue.
Hope you get to see them sometime over Christmas.
It is hard isn't it. My mum takes my grandma to stay at her house every now and then when she gets really bad, but she still likes to have her own independence when she is not as porley so we don't want her to give up her flat just yet. Eventually though, she will probably move in with my mum.
Indeed!
Great timing to remind everyone, thank you!
taking care of parents and grandparents, throughout the year is something many of us sadly forget. They took care of us while young, we should only do the same for them
Absolutely! I am guilty of forgetting too. I partly wrote this to make myself accountable for my actions and partly to remind everyone about how much we should cherish the elders in our lives. :)
My grandparents lived with us (my family) since I was six. I miss my grandfather so much since he passed on. I still find myself thinking "I should ask my granpa about this" or "Granpa would get a kick out of that" and he's been gone for years. I'm so glad that my grandmother made him write out a life story for me to keep.
OH my, That must be amazing! I love to hear my Grandma talk about her life. Although she has dementia and Alzheimer's, her long term memory is still good. She loved to tell you about how she bossed the men around at her job working for rolls royce lol
Too funny!
@beautifulbullies please do try and visit your grand parents. You grand dad does exactly what my grand dad would have done. When we when younger we always go to his place for the weekend and he will always buy us sweets we loved him so much because when ever we wanted something he always gave it to us. He would always help with technical home works and during resumption he would help us wrap our books to prevent them from tearing. He taught me how to speak the bini language and and how to set animal traps. When the moon was full he would always tell us tales by the moon light. But then he feel sick; he had diabetes. I kept on postponing the day I would go and visit him. The day I was finally going to visit he gave up before I got to the hospital. Till today I still feel guilty because with all he did for me I couldn't go to the hospital to visit. He was the one who named me fona meaning perfect though the full name is Osaofona meaning only God is perfect. So please @beautifulbullies no matter what, no matter the awkwardness just try and visit and you will see that it's not going to be as awkward as you thought.
OH @fona, I am so sorry to hear your story :( I will definitely go and see them, especially after what you have said. Thank you for sharing x
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Yeh I know that feel, this month has been pretty awful, so much end of year stuff happening, having to prep for Silly Season, and then I run mysef into the ground like an idiot and then either forget what day it is or am just too tired to go visit! (this also sounds like a lame excuse but this is literally that equivalent-of-drunk-not-safe-to-drive kinda tired)
This situation shall be remedied!