Jewish Lemons (True story)

In the days of my childhood, children of many different ethnicities lived on our street: Tatars, Chuvashes, Mordvins, Jews, Koreans, Germans, Uzbek, Tajiks, Lulu, Gypsies, Slavs, Balts... Many of those kids were my friends and some of them still are. This story is about my Jewish friends.
Back then, two Jewish families lived on our street. They were large families, noisy, quarrelsome, poor; brothers and sisters wore hand downs of their siblings.

In our childhood tangerines were the symbol of wealth. We saw children of well-off families such as those of store directors, salespeople, communist party bosses and KGB personnel as if surrounded by tangerines all year around.

Yet, us, the children of mere mortals, saw fresh tangerines only once a year, for New Year holidays. Perhaps, in places of the Soviet subtropics such a Georgia, Sochi and Abkhazia, things were different, since tangerines grew there.

As we started to talk about Citrus plants, I can tell you a funny story. During 1970’s the USSR sold to Israel precious spans of the Holy Land. Great Russian Dukes, Princes, and Emperors collected this land by tinctures while obtuse Soviet Leaders, instead of developing their own Citrus industry, devoured those precious lands. These idiots exchanged them for a three-year crop of Israeli oranges and lemons. And what about the “Jewish question?” How did they go around the fact that there were no diplomatic relations between Israel and the USSR?

Well, gloating and foolish Soviet politicians resolve the Jewish Question in a petty way. They asked Israelis to forge the stickers on fruits. Jews shrugged and agreed… “If those Shmucks need this, let them have the “Morocco” instead of “Israel” on stickers… We ain’t gonna lose business because of stupid stickers on lemons.
Yeah. No diplomatic relationship at a time. What can one do? Dumb cosmopolitans governed the Soviet Union while Israel was ruled by start Jews!
That’s why Jews constantly beat the Arabs who, according to the Soviet media, were armed with the “with the most advanced modern Soviet weaponry, having no equal in the World” and taught by the Soviet officer-advisers…
Incidentally, Israelis defeated the Soviet troops as well in Bekaa Valley in June 1982… Those who doubt it, check out the Operation Mole Cricket 19. The management of the Syrian army was conducted by the Soviet Generals and officers.
The Word’s largest air defense forces were created, armed with the most modern at the time systems “Cube”, “Volga” and “Pechora.”

A total of 24 Syrian anti-aircraft missile battalions were deployed in a combat order of 30 kilometers along the front and 28 kilometers in depth. These forces were required to cover Syrian troops in the Lebanese Bekaa Valley. As a result, Israelis smashed their enemy overnight with almost no losses on their side.

The main Syrian advisor, Colonel General G.P. Yashin, thus reported to the shocked senile imbeciles in Polit Bureau of Communist Party about the reasons for this defeat:
“All the receivers of the Syrian military equipment were subjected to high-density interference over the entire frequency range. To attenuate those interferences, the power of Israeli equipment should have been reduced 20-30 times. Unfortunately, Syrians had no such capabilities. Neither did we.

The means of radio-electronic reconnaissance and interference of the Syrian Armed Forces, at that time, could neither provide a disruption of the enemy’s command and weaponry, nor minimum protection of their own air force, SAM and other air defense assets only for the reason of a limited frequency range of suppression.

In this war, the Israelis created a well-functioning and equipped with modern technology REB system. EW assets were installed even on tanks, ships, not to mention combat aircraft, and even more specialized ones, such as Boeing 707, S-97 Hokai, Phantom (AF-4ji). The integrated and massive use of EW, missiles and guided bombs with optoelectronic and radar homing heads was a decisive condition for Israel's success in suppressing the Syrian air defense group in Lebanon and gaining air supremacy in aviation.
Experience has shown that without a modern automated control system, stable noise immunity of radar facilities and communication facilities, the creation of the necessary radar field for aircraft, it is impossible to control modern aviation and air defense systems."
Translated from the military to a normal language it sounded as follow: “The enemy blinded us and had banged us in all possible holes.”

An eyewitness of the disaster, field commander Abu Jihad described it as mundane and romantic at the same time: "Everyone looked up in the sky. I also looked up - and saw one of the most breathtaking spectacles I've ever seen. The battle of hundreds of fighters unfolded right above our heads. Israeli air attacks never caused us significant damage, but this time it was not about the bombing: the fight was between Israeli and Syrian fighter jets.

Israel bombarded Syrian missiles deployed in the Beck Valley, and now the Syrian fighters tried to prevent the destruction of the remnants of Syrian air defense by the Israelis. A tragic picture unfolded before our very eyes.

Israeli fighters shot down Syrian aircraft one by one, like flies, and the support of the United Syrian Armed Forces from the ground was useless. Zionists had at their disposal modern F-14, F-15, and F-16, while Syrians had for the most part old Russian MIGs. It was like a car race between the new Ferrari and the old Toyota: no matter how good a driver you were, you did not have the slightest chance of winning. "

Such destructions always have happened and will happen when lions are led by sheep…

Back to my Jewish peers… I talked to them over Skype not so long ago. Some of them now settled in the USA, New York, someone in Israel, someone in France ...

Among ourselves, we are still boys and girls calling each other by diminutive childish names.

Appearance wise they all look great! Shining with solid white dentistry work, possess tortured by fitness, toned bodies, dressed in stylish clothes….

Curiously enough, from the boys of our class that remained to live in the CIS countries, a lot has already passed away. Yet those that departed in the late 80's to the jungle of the capitalist West are all alive and well and look 5 years younger than us, those who remained in our native land.

To a superficial judgment, all that unifies me with my Jewish childhood friends was a common past: the bright Soviet childhood, kindergarten, school, the ideals of the youth.

It was the Russian language, Russian and Soviet literature, songs, dances, Soviet Sport…

And of course, it was a feeling of togetherness in games, sports clubs, boy scout camps, pranks, fights, theft of fruit, courtship, baked potatoes on bonfires ... All this is easily understood; always have been.

Now I'm old, I've lived through a lot and I've seen much. Perhaps, all that has happened in my life would be enough for three regular lives.

…and now, when I contemplate, “lower myself to the very bottom of thought” so to speak… I realize that there is something deeper that unifies us; something that I begin to vaguely understand only today.
It is that ephemeral and obscure ghost of the great country, where I was born and spent my golden years of childhood; the country I still love, but which no longer exists, and never will...