Black Friday is a heck of day. Even with the lethargic turkey venom coursing through the populace's veins, they manage to creep and crawl out into the wilderness of the concrete jungles and scratch, bite, and claw their way to the best deals in the city.

I say to hell with all that mess. Cyber Monday is for us more civilized folks that prefer not to fight over merchandise that is disguised as 'on sale' or a limited supply. So hats off to all you die hard shoppers, I'll be in the comfort of my skin, using the same amazing technology I now write this, to buy some gifts.