One of the problems when it comes to understanding each other is that we tend to use rationale only.

We look for reasons to empathize with someone.

If there are no real reasons, we don't see a need to care.

While this is logical, it doesn't speak of love.

This process says things like, "He made a mistake. He deserves it. He needs to work it out himself. It is his own fault. It does not concern me.

I do not understand. Why should I care?"

If you ask me, true empathy comes from not understanding.

This is where you say things like, "Even though I do not understand, even though it is his own fault, even though he brought this upon himself, even though it has nothing to do with me...

... It is okay.

I don't need to punish him for the sake of punishment.

I think he has already learnt his lesson.

I think he has had it hard.

I think he could use my support right now.

I don't need to know the full story or nitpick the little details.

Because I know I'll forgive him.

Because I want to be a pillar of support for him.

Because I don't need to follow what the rest of the world is doing to him now.

Because I love him."

That's true empathy.

That's unconditional love.

Maybe it's time to see who around you truly understands you.

Maybe it's time to see who you truly love.

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Posted from my blog with SteemPress : http://alden-tan.com/do-not-understand/

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